OOOh...this is good stuff to help people try to understand

I am borrowing this from a fellow adoptive parents website-she is awesome & has an awesome support group. I WISH I had it as together as she did & was brave enough to say what she says. RAD stands for reactive attachment disorder-something that every adoptive child/adoptive family deals with on some level to some degree. On that note...here it is:
"From Diana, who I love very much. We are so very different, but so very the same (which is my favorite kind of person!). She is an encouragement to me. You will not find a mother who advocates or fights harder for her kids ... even when it means getting snarky. Today's quote is just a little reminder for all of us. We have all found ourselves being judgmental in some way at some time. My high point was before I had kids and I knew EVERYTHING about parenting. Anyone else? Come on ... I see that hand, sister! I will say that one of the most painful things I've had said to me in the last year and a half was, "Ah heck, MY kids do that!" You could probably isolate some of these behaviors and identify them as "developmentally appropriate." However, in our homes, they are multiplied by a million and then laced with speed.Oh, how I wish I were exaggerating. Seriously. No exaggeration. And on that note ... ladies and gentlement ...

Diana:"What? You don’t get it? You can’t imagine an adorable precious 5 year old child creating this much terror and driving their mother to such lunacy? You want to try to minimize the situation or one-up me by telling me this is just “normal” kid stuff and your “normal” kid does this, too? Perhaps you’re finding yourself wanting to dole out all sorts of benevolent parenting advice…or maybe you’re tempted to judge me because of my honesty and blame me for causing all the problems – maybe he’s the way he is because I’m too strict in some areas or too permissive in others or because I have anger issues of my own? Well, let me tell you. If you fall into any of those categories above, spare me the lecture (I’ve heard them all anyway) and get down on your knees right now and thank God that you don’t get it. Seriously. Rather than trying to play the hero armchair quarterback, get down and thank God that you don’t know what it’s like to live with a traumatized child…a child who is the way he is because of the STUPID, SELFISH choices of other people…and then pray that His grace and mercy and strength will be with those of us who do live with these kids and that He will carry us through the rough times like this. And when you’re done, hug your own kids a little tighter; catch them doing something right; express a little more gratitude for them; take a few minutes to play with them and don’t forget to tell them just how much you love them and how glad you are to be their parent."

We love our children. We do not regret our children. We accept and embrace this crazy, RADical life we live. We are committed to their health and well being. And we absolutely, positively cannot do it alone. If you are called to be in our lives, to be our support, we will kiss you on the mouth and let you know what we need from you (always, ALWAYS, start with something sweet and fattening). If you just don't get it, don't feel bad. It even took all of US a long time to get it. Just journal it. Keep it to yourself unless you are asking questions to learn and understand more. Our children are scared, yes, but it does result in us getting emotionally beat to a pulp each and every day. As my Mom and Dad used to say (usually to a Deacon - ba-dum-bum-CHING!), "Hey! I can get this kind of abuse at home. I don't need it from you!"
"It takes a village to keep a special needs parent from jumping off the roof."-Christine Moers"

I love it. If I had guts and a better vocabulary, I'd say the exact same thing. We love you all & we appreciate you being in our lives. God put you there for a reason. So...Pray for us, Love us, Tolerate Us, but most of all just let us know that you are there.

Sorry...I lied

I know I said I was done posting but this is too important. There is a boy who needs a good, stable home. I don't know this boy but I read his mother's blog. I got to her blog through a series of other adoption/post adoption/reactive attachment disorder blogs that I read. It helps to read that others are going through the same stuff as you-or worse. I am not a good savvy blogger so I'll have to just post the link for you to go to. This boy will need a loving home in which he is the youngest (by a ways) or the only child. Please forward this to whoever you think might be interested. Please, please pray for this boy & this family. I CANNOT imagine having to make this choice. The website is: http://watchingthewaters.wordpress.com/2009/10/06/family-needed/

Thanks & keep praying!